Oyez, Oyez, Oyez, Hear ye, Hear ye, Hear ye.

or, in the Eastend vernacular, of the great unwashed, of which I was once one;

“Pin back yer lug ‘oles an’ lissen”

On Thursday last, the first day of autumn here, up in the Southern Hemisphere, at 14.45 hours, I had the appointment with the audiologist, which I’d told you about in a previous post, and which by now, you will have completely forgotten.

Having a thing about punctuality, I, in company with the War Office, arrived there at 14.20 which gave me plenty of time to go get the bloke who’d fixed my ⌚️ watch, the day before,  to check as I was having a slight problem. Also gave the W.O time to go buy her coffee which she’d forgotten to buy.

Promptly at 14.45 I/we were summoned into the presence of the audiologist, a young lady by the name of Minerva Ho. Obviously of Asian heritage but a dinki-di Aussie; who’s parents seemed to have a thing for ancient Roman mythology when it came to selecting names for their offspring. Well in Minerva case at least.

Pity they liked the Roman, not the Greek, as I much prefer Athene, and Greek mythology compared to the Roman and Jewish mythology. More fun 👿

Minerva then went to work on me. First with some headphones 🎧, and I could hear her, calling from somewhere just to the west of Zeus, oops  Jupiter,the headphones gave the impression of someone calling/speaking to me from out of space, and I had some difficulty hearing what was being said.🙉🙉

I must say here that Minerva has an excellent speaking voice; I suppose she needs it in her line of work. She enunciates her words, slowly and clearly, and it is quite easy to understand what she’s saying.

Well whilst I had the headphones on. 😈

Stuffing (disperser likes stuff) my ears with some ear pieces, which were quite uncomfortable, she proceeded to put me through some exercises for want of a better word;  where I had to sing out whenever I heard a sound, I found this very difficult and distressing.

Then  she started speaking and I had to identify the words she uttered, at least I think it was Minerva saying the words. This was even more difficult. I must admit that I was feeling very uncomfortable whilst all this was going on and was getting quite agitated.

After completing the test, Minerva told me that I have a very severe, significant, hearing loss and that I was in great need of hearing aids. 

She then produced a pair or aids, obviously an audiologists pair, that can be used, manipulated to fit/suit any of her patients; are we patients? I suppose in a sense we are, have to ask Mordred, anyone knows he will, King Arthur relied on him as do I . 😈

After making some adjustments, putting some things on the end, she plugged them into my ears and twiddled with her computer and then I started to hear quite clearly.

More twiddling, more refinements,  and she turned, and told me, and the War Office who was witness to my agonies; to go for a stroll around the centre,  have a coffee, ☕️ ☕️and get used to the sounds,  the noises,  inherent in such places  and return in 10-15 minutes to see how I went.

So we did! With these things stuck in my ears we set forth; at first the sounds coming through was just a jumbled mess, gradually it started to clear and I could hear the stuff that purports to be music, and the sound of voices in conversation quite clearly. 

I must admit that it awakened memories of years ago, when all these sounds and noises were an everyday thing, I was tempted to turn them off, and go back into what I realized was a very quite,  almost silent,serene, existence. I also realized that the sounds that I was now hearing, were not the sounds that I’d heard with my old hearing aids, from some 10 years earlier and that I’d given the old heave ho.

Advanced technology! 🕬  🕬

We went back and Minerva told me of my options as to hearing aids. 

Being a poor old. part pensioner, and senior citizen,  I am entitled to a free pair of hearing aids, courtesy of the Australian Government, well not the present government, they’d like to get rid of our socialized system and embrace the US system, but of an Australian Labor Party government, past;  (had to get a plug in for a decent humane system of government). 👏👏👏

There are various types and levels of aids, the Rolls Royce pair are around $8.999.00, if I planned to live another ten fifteen years I’d probably go for them, but as I’ll be lucky to see out Christmas, I went for a level up from the basic pair,  which have some sort of automatic system, that will adjust to the environment which I’m in, without my having to fiddle and mess around with some buttons,  or switches.

Something along those lines; and the cost is not great, or exorbitant.

The aids have been ordered, and are now being made, to the specifications of  Miss Minerva Ho and will be ready for me, at 14.30 hours on Friday week, the 16th March.

I will switch them on on Sunday the 18th.


34 thoughts on “Oyez, Oyez, Oyez, Hear ye, Hear ye, Hear ye.

  1. Why are you waiting a day to switch them on?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I wondered the same thing!


      1. St Patricks day the 17th, shut out all the yahoo’s
        By the bye I’ve checked the SPAM folder, couldn’t see anything from you there, just disperser stuffing himself on the SPAM, he can’t get enough of the stuff. he likes stuff.


  2. Hey! That’s great news!

    . . . you’ll now be able to at least hear what you don’t understand . . .

    Liked by 4 people

    1. as good a reason as any I suppose 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  3. It’ll will be worth it if only to hear your grandchildren laughing!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That is one of the sounds that I’ve has no trouble hearing PT, something to do with wavelengths or something


  4. I remember an aunt of mine who had one of those old hearing aids which was pinned to the front of her dress and had a long wire to the ear piece which must have been a real distraction. When the batteries were running down she kept tapping the box in an effort to keep it going a bit longer.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well my old one wasn’t that bad just that it made the voices appear as though they were coming through a tin can submerged under the Antarctic ice

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Good news, Brian. You are a patient, provided you don’t mind hanging around waiting

    Liked by 2 people

    1. For some strange reason I’m never kept waiting, don’t get the chance to be impatient, what’s it like?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Well, who would dare keep you waiting – or me, for that matter 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Yay! Cool! Good!
    But, as an intelligent man, you can still practice Selective Hearing! 😉 😀 😛 Especially when it’s to your benefit! 😉 😛 😈
    HUGS!!! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. 🙄🙄and I plan on being very selective 👿 😈 🐻🐻🐕

      Liked by 1 person

        1. 🙉🙈🙊 🐶🐾🐾🐾 🐻 🐼 🐩🐩🐩

          Liked by 1 person

        2. Carolyn 🐾 🐾 🐶 I know you will just love this post kate is such an elegant writer,. ☺️ 😲 🐕🐕🐕https://kateshrewsday.com/2018/03/04/macaulay-and-the-white-forest/#comment-158797

          Liked by 1 person

  7. Quite a shock to be hearing stuff you haven’t heard for some time!
    I wonder how much loss I have suffered? I do know there is some in upper registers.
    I may have to go to the local equivalent of your Westward Ho, or is she Land Ho? Maybe one of the Santa Claus triplets?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Indeed it was, I was amazed at how it suddenly took on clarity. I didn’t think it was possible, especially in my case, I come from a family where deafness was a certainty

      Liked by 1 person

      1. The modern era certainly has its advantages. Back before laser cataract treatments and lens replacements, I’d be blind.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I was told recently when I was tested for new specs that looks like I’m getting cataracts, at my age don’t think I’ll worry too much about it. But things are definitely a lot brighter for the people today

          Liked by 1 person

        2. Before you dismiss the idea of treating cataracts, run a comparison with someone of good eyesight. Could be you are missing a lot and whether the improved vision is for twenty days or twenty years it is still improving the quality of those twenty-whatevers.

          Liked by 1 person

        3. Well when I see my GP on Friday I’ll mention it to him and he can give me a referral to a specialist 😀

          Liked by 1 person

  8. I remember getting glasses for the first time, and seeing the world so clearly: every leaf, every line. It was wonderful. When you switch the new ones on, I wonder if it will be like that, only with sound. I wish you peace and clarity x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Kate, I’m quietly confident this time, although the purity of sound won’t be there I’ll at least be able to hear; which will please certain members of the household,

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Those testing and fitting sessions are really agitating – those weird things in ear.
    But I agree, No matter you shelf life, go for the full life experience ( you can always turn them off secretly like my grandmother and just smile and nod happily in your won serenity.)
    Oh, Greek mythology and no Norse? HAHA The Greeks are a real fun bunch and soap opera scene

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You won’t get any argument from me when it comes to the Greek mythology, everything else pales into insignificance.
      Deafness runs in my family, My dear ol’ dad was stone deaf before 70, his mother and father were both completely deaf. My mother used to say that there are none as deaf as those that don’t want to hear.
      I must admit it’s nice, sometimes, to be able to switch off and disconnect, especially when the War Office is berating me 👿

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Runs in husband’s family, too – get all the siblings together and it’s a shout fest…the dog and I head outside.


  10. Bedlam! 😈 D Still I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone, it can get quite lonely at times


  11. What a wonderful thing this will be–when you want it to be! I’ve missed being over here for a bit–and am super happy to hear this good news. 🙂 I remember an old relative of mine (related to my grandmother) who was blind and somewhat deaf. He held a horn-like thing up to his ear when absolutely necessary. The rest of the time he was probably happy he couldn’t hear all the noise in the household (lots of children and grandchildren living in the same house). 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  12. How are you doing?
    Just wanted to check in on you and The War Office and Coco!


    1. I haven’t been feeling the best the last few days or so Carolyn, have just turned on the computer after being off line for a couple of days or more, I’m hoping to catch up on all the posts I follow my email box is chock a block with notifications, which makes me feel rather negligent and rude. 👴👴 😦

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Don’t worry about being online and comments and such! You are NOT being rude or negligent!
        You must take care of you! and a break from the internet is a good break! 🙂 😛 😀
        I’m so sorry to hear you haven’t been feeling well. 😦 I wondered…as you were on my mind and sometimes when I get someone on my mind it’s because they are not well. So, just wanted to check in on you.
        ❤ , Healing wishes, HUGS and 🙂 😛 😀 😈 🐻 smileys!!! :mrgreen: 🙂


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